Ending relationships – Is it BPD?

It’s still May: Borderline Personality Disorder Awareness Month: This is a really great blog and in particular, this blog post describes BPD in terms of how many people are confused about it and label it on people without understanding the full extent of what it is about and really understanding the diagnosis. When a relationship ends, or gets “crazy”, it seems that many people think their partner has BPD based on a few, granted, extreme types of behaviors, but in fact these are very common behaviors in humans when ending or acting out in very intimate romantic/sexual relationships. Even if one of the people is going hot and cold from one day to the next and pushing and pulling away, starting arguments to get closer, threatening crazy things, having a lot of angry outbursts, doing scary things like punching walls or getting very drunk or disappearing and reappearing, none of that stuff guarantees the person has BPD. Indeed, if you want to get inside someone who really suffers from BPD, think of your worst, most scary bad or painful relationship in which some of the above behaviors occurred, and imagine that happening not just daily but feeling that unsure about yourself and others moment to moment and also having the other criteria that this blogger explains in more detail; if you imagine this or have felt this way, you might be able to begin to understand the pain and suffering involved in having this disorder:

S.L.Grigg - Author

I hate you - don't leave me.  Image by Kaoxita - Deviant Art.com  (http://www.deviantart.com/art/I-hate-you-don-t-leave-me-102465289) I hate you – don’t leave me.
Image by Kaoxita – Deviant Art.com

A diagnosis of BPD is not something to be taken lightly, it is life altering, in many ways.

Increasingly I am finding that people are contacting me through my blog regarding their relationship difficulties. Mainly the end of a relationship that has been quite turbulent or toxic, most often the person breaking off the relationship in these scenarios is a woman, and nearly every message includes reference to a concern that the ‘ex’ in question had/has BPD. I apologise if you have recently written to me about something like this, you may not like what you are about to read, but it’s nothing personal about anyone who has contacted me, just a general observation and attempt to clarify things a little…

I recognise that writing this post is likely to bring a few attacks and trolls…

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