Day 77: Door Knobs and Magic

In my current closet office there is a door, the kind with panes of glass in a grid, light wood. Apperently that door will not fit on this closet. When I began working here, I put a gold fabric on the door to make a background for remote therapy. We had bought a ton of big long fabric like this years ago, including Sari fabric. I think it was for using partitions to separate places in the loft. We build one of those yerts in the middle of the loft.

Anyway the gold backdrop was too dark and not working, so I put a green bed sheet over the door which was fine. It took me a while to realize the door itself was the perfect back drop and I unclothed it and kept it there (not that it was going anywhere).

I’ve always loved doors, all kinds. I got to see all kinds of doorknobs in our apartment growing up. There were a lot of glass doorknobs, also metal, kind of bronze colored with some kind of design on them, and just metal doorknobs.

On a side note, the entrance “hall”, about 4 feet square when you got out on our floor had mirrors going on both walls in both directions. It was awesom to look at your self down all these mirrors. The floor was black and white checked like a chess board, very fun to play on too. I don’t know what posessed my parents to redo that hallway that was so Alice in Wonderland with the padded flowery wallpaper and no mirrors.

Glass doorknobs are weird. Find one and look at it for a while. We have a few in a box that I want to put maybe on our bathroom door. If you stare at one long enough, something happens. It looks like a rattle for a very large baby when each one is connected with the bar. Maybe I will bring one to my studio.

In my current studio I have several doors. I have the door to get in,the door to the closet, and the door between the two rooms that are my studio. As one point I had to put a new doorknob in my closet but I did it wrong so they don’t close the door completely. A client who knows a lot about all kinds of things noticed right away that it was on backwards.

There was a glass doorknob on a closet at the end of a very long hall dividing up the rooms in our apartment. There were bedrooms on both sides. I developped a strange fear of the glass doorknob at night, so going down the hall to go to bed was a big deal. I can’t remember if it mattered whether the light was on or off or why I didin’t turn on the light if it was off. THe long hallway was kind of scary on its own. It reminds me of the hallway in Yellow Submarine, there’s this long hallway wtih all these doors on it. I didn’t realize Yellow Submarine is the same age as I am. My sister ha the luck of it being the first movie she ever saw, must have been age 4 or 5.

I would go down the hall looking down to avoid looking straight at the menacing doorknob. ,

In Bewitched, my favorite character, the weird aunt witch who messes up all her spells, Aunt Clara. Funny that Clara is from the word clear. She also has a weird habit of collecting doorknobs, which is of course fabulous and I wish I could see her collection. When I was a kid, I was into collecting for the sake of collecting and wanted to have a collection of collections. I collected travel toothbrushes, postcards and music boxes and of course stickers.

One day I would like to have a room made only from doors, but I’m not sure it’s possible. When my kid was playing Minecraft maybe age 6, she loved building houses and built me a house made of doors.

In my studio my interior door has changed over the years. I had started painting it and one of my clients started painting a mermaid on the door. Then one of the other clients found it disturbing mostly because it was made by a different client. I think I painted over the beginning and made the mermaid myself and assured the client she ddidn’ have to look at another client’s painting on a door.

Many other therapists probably wouln’t have told the client anything abou tthe painting on the door to begin with and would have just explored what was bothering the client and left it that way and made her just deal with it. I processed her feelings about it and why it disturbed her and then changed it; I gave in to her and did something she knew was for her. It was therapeutic for her but probably seems not very therapist rule ish. In art therapy you can get away with doing weird thigns like that. At some point a few years ago, I got annoyed at the half finished mermaid painting on the door and painted over it white adn then an abstract pattern. Everyone loves that door. It looks better than an unfinished mermaid. I had another client say that my studio was like a messy garage with old used paintbrushes in it and wanted to work in a room without all the mess and just two white chairs. OBviously that was not a wish I could or would have granted him, although if I had witch powers, it would be fun to change my office into weird places, the way people change their zoom backgrounds.

There’s one by a well known Japanese anime cartoonist and it has a fish coming through the side walk as well as an open door. I’ve never seen a fish coming through a floor, and I wonder what it means.


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