Book Chapter!

I haven’t posted since February 7. I’m going back to trying short posts more often. I get too long winded and don’t finish posts. Hoping it helps me post more often. Say more with less…

This is the book I have a chapter in. (It’s available on Amazon for range of high prices: 50$ -95$).

The book is edited by Anastacia Kurylo, a Professor in Communication Studies at St. Joseph’s College. She has written several books about communication and stereotypes. I highly recommend her blog, The Communicated Stereotype:

Anastacia Kurylo’s Blog

The book is mostly written by communication professors. Chapter 15, my chapter, is in the last 4th part of the book, called “Practical Tips for  Navigating Intergroup Status.” It’s called, ” Questions That Open up the Field of Impossible Things”.

My writing process, as always, was crazy and torturous, however, I am excited that it has yielded results and an edited finished product with footnotes. I’ve had my visual art in published books before, but this is the first time I’ve had my writing published. The joke is that it is in a book about communication; a lot of people find what I say to be incoherent and confusing! I’m still learning the English Language…

Just Show Up and Be Here Now! Getting through difficult times like the holidays…

For some, the holidays are your favorite time of year and you love almost everything about them. As therapists, we are well aware that the holidays may be more than unpleasant for other people. In fact, for some, it is a matter of surviving the holidays and breathing a sigh of relief on Jan. 2.

For anybody, whether you like the holidays or not, if you need to ease up on yourself and your own self judgments, this piece from Elephant Journal about Yoga is great. I will copy the link but also take the article and substitute “I” and other appropriate words for the word Yoga and change it around slightly to be a reflection on our abilities to be nice to ourselves.

Here is the original article. You may not be able to read it after today as the Elephant Journal locks the articles on their site to encourage joining…

You and your life are not defined by your lifestyle, beliefs, weight, diet, flexibility, how spiritual or enlightened you are, or if you even are “spiritual” at all. You are just about being yourself and just choosing to show up each new day—You are not alone in the daily struggle. For many, each day is a new struggle just to show up to his/her life and stay. This post honors those with the most despair and pain who are brave and show up despite all the emotional scars and pain.

Try saying this to yourself when you are down on yourself or not “doing enough” or “changing” enough.

I don’t care what my hair looks like.

I don’t care how I am dressed today or if I even was able to get out of bed and shower and dress.

I don’t care if I am following some kind of fancy or healthy eating plan or eating the “bad” foods today. It’s good enough that I show up and eat something to keep myself going…

I don’t care when the last time I did this particular activity (fill in the blanks)

I don’t care if I show up cranky or exhausted to my life today.

I don’t care what I believe in or if I believe “in” anything. I’m here and that is enough.

I don’t care what color my skin is or what gender I choose to love or what gender or non gender I am. I don’t care about others’ appearance, sexual orientation, gender, etc. either. We all share similar struggles and pain.

I don’t care how much money I have, what house or space I live in, what car I drive, or if I have to live on the streets right now.

I don’t care what my apartment, house, living space etc. looks like right now. It doesn’t matter; what matters is that I am still here anyway.

I don’t care if I smoke cigarettes, drink, use substances that are illegal, eat too much, binge and purge, starve myself, or am addicted to sex or other things or whether I hoard things in my abode. I’m still here and I showed up to this new day and that is enough.

I don’t care if I am single, with someone, with several people, in a messy relationship, stuck in a difficult relationship or anything else.

I don’t care when I woke up or if I have not gotten out of bed, I’m still here even if I have to stay in bed all day.

I don’t care what my job is, whether I have one, whether I graduated high school, college, grad school, whether I finished any project or life goal or whether I even have anything I want to “do with my life”.

I don’t care if I have a family or none at all, and I don’t care what my family or anyone else thinks about me.

I care that I showed up for today. I care enough to stay.

Back to the Concept of the Selfie and What it Means for Art Therapy and Psychology…

In my first post on the selfie, I had grand ambitions to write on a number of different aspects of the selfie. Here was my list of topics, not in any particular order:

1. The selfie and art therapy: is there anything going on in art therapy connected directly to the making of selfies?
2. The how to and what not to do: finding lots of links about making great selfies versus bad boring ones and sites that like to show the different categtories of bad selfies vs good ones.
3. the celebrity selfie and its effects on non celebrity selfies.
4. Selfies and Social Media: what it means to “post” a selfie after taking the photo. new variations include the “belfie” as body parts can depict self portraits.
3. Creative uses of the selfie: what are some selfies that go beyond casual and become “Art”? how do you think outside the box of the selfie!
4. Woman and selfies: the male gaze versus the female gazing at herself. Selfies for self-esteem…
5. The new pathologies associated with taking selfies to an extreme. As with anything, if you become addicted to making selfies, you will of course get sick, just like people addicted to the internet or social media or gambling. Too much of anything and your system is way out of balance.
6. Selfies and psychosis: while we are at it, besides ocd and addiction, are people incorporating selfies into their psychotic episodes?

A long time ago, I actually did find an article about a man who got so addicted and obsessed with taking selfies that he decompensated (became very unstable). I am interested to see if I can find this article and whether there were further reports on him or anyone else having brought the selfie to the level of pathology…

I finally found the article, which I remembered was about a British man, a selfie addict with body dysmorphic disorder which definitely got triggered or worsened by his taking selfies all day long. He stopped functioning and tried to kill himself. Here is the link to the article: